I’ve been scammed and it’s a harrowing experience.
Once scammed, the experience stays with you – like a nagging tooth ache that continuously sears through your consciousness.
Nagging questions keep me up at night:
- How do you decipher between a real message and a faux alert?
- How do you know when you hire someone to do a remote job for you who you are REALLY getting? A real person? A bot?
Falling into my inbox is an alert from “UPS” signalling an undeliverable package. SCAM.
Popping up on my cell phone is a warning from an “FBI Agent” that an employee at the bank I patronize is under suspicion of stealing funds and can I help them confirm this? SCAM.
Cluttering my Inbox with daily glowing recommendations are offers from a plethora of “marketing professionals” promising to elevate my book The Secret Life of a Weight Obsessed Woman to new, undreamed of levels of visibility. The first few highly flattering e mails tantalized me with delight – but the more offers I received, couched in very similar language – led me to believe most were bot generated. SCAM.
It’s a sad state of affairs that now every transaction calls for close scrutiny, questioning and mulling over. Years ago that simply wasn’t the case. We all were less guarded, less suspicious and more trusting.
And years ago is when I found Irna. I had confidence in her from the get-go BECAUSE she was highly recommended by someone I trusted too.
Every Friday at 3pm, my weekly newsletter gets delivered to my subscribers and posted on my website (irisruthpastor.com). This does not happen automatically. This happens because Irna does her job and she does it well.
THE DEAL: I write my column, e mail her a copy and she then drops it into Mail Chimp, formats it and adds my pictures and/or illustrations. We worked out a payment schedule and off we went.
Over the years of Irna and I working together, I glean tidbits of info about her life:
- She is married with one child
- She lives in a small town called Zenica in Bosnia and Herzegovina about 5450 miles from me. (And she tells me that when you translate Zenica to English, it means IRIS – like the part of an eye.)
- She and her family live in an apartment and live close enough to visit her parents and in-laws weekly. (I envy the proximity. How many of us live in moderate driving distance to our parents, our adult kids, and/or our grandchildren?)
Irna, though never having traveled to the United States, is proficient in English.
“My childhood best friend Gabi moved to the US when we were kids.” Irna relates. “And she used to send me letters that I knew how to read but couldn’t write in English and I was so mad about it…. I took some additional classes in school. …and English is a second language in schools here and it’s mandatory.”
Curious, I asked Irna the following question: Would you say your life is generally peaceful or anxiety filled?
“My life is peaceful with a dose of rush because my daughter is 10 so we are always running to her acting or guitar classes,” Irna answered. “Both my parents and in-laws are healthy and happy, my husband and I are celebrating our 10-year anniversary in two days and it’s a cliché, but I really married my best friend and I think that is what makes our life great. My daughter is happy and thriving, my dog is my soulmate. Ha Ha. I don’t need anything else. It’s the little things in life that are making me so happy.”
I asked Irna to tell me how she likes working with me: an American lady old enough to be her mother, who does not share a religion or a nationality:
“I was 25 when I first started working on Iris’s social media accounts. I was a young mom and I was chasing every job opportunity to learn more, earn more, be more so I could be a great role model for my daughter. I am 35 now, I still work with Iris, I read each column a couple of times and I recently realized how much I have actually taken every advice from her column seriously. Working with Iris is something I NEEDED. The wisdom, laughs, and her kindness is like a ray of sunshine in my life. She melts my heart like ice cream on a sunny day. She sends text messages that start with Dear and she glues a smile on my face with just one word. I cherish our relationship, our brainstorming, and her columns. She is my girlie!”
And it’s not surprising how much I cherish Irna. We should all be blessed with “Irna’s” in our lives – people we work with who we genuinely care for and trust.
I’m not so sure that today I would have taken a chance and ready engaged Irna. And I’m sorry for so many that will lose out on this win-win type of relationship due to a pervasive fear of the ever-present scammers.
So I reiterate: word of mouth, word of mouth, word of mouth from a trusted source is the safest route to go when expanding your network.
Keep Preserving Your Bloom,
JEAN JACKET OF THE WEEK:
I recently sent Irna and her daughter a jean jacket. It’s nice to do things for people who appreciate it. And Irna does.
NO SCAM there.