What Fosters our Sense of Connection and Costs Absolutely Nothing?

I couldn’t understand why my mood shifts substantially north when the bag boy at my neighborhood grocery gives me his habitual “Hi Five” and over exaggerated wink while placing my perishables in a paper bag.
 

 
Or why my step lightens when, driving down my street on my way to run errands, I spot my mailman’s truck and he waves and I honk. 

Or why I’m flooded with happiness when the lady down the street laughs when I pass her by on my daily walk and casually remark to her that she has an open invitation to come to my house and re-pot my root-bound flowers too. 
 

 
The above scenarios foster our sense of connection and cost us absolutely nothing. 
 
But what exactly are these interactions? And why are they so important?
They are: Weak Ties
 
Devin Soni in an article called “The Power of Weak Ties,” said, “These are ties between people that know each other, but not particularly well. In real-world terms, these are the people that you interact with once a month, whom you probably do not see very often. You may not have much in common with your weak ties, and most of your weak ties will not know each other. 
 
Weak Ties are loose connections, often fleeting in time. 
 
They make us happier than we think and matter more than we realize. 
They expand our sense of well-being.
They provide connection.
They increase our sense of meaning and our sense of security.
They provide joy.
They reduce our feeling of loneliness.
 
When we get out of our social bubble of close contacts, we  experience the world through an additional lens – a lens that is unfamiliar, uncontrollable and untapped.  
 
We usually know what we can expect behaviorally from our friends and family, but don’t know how we will be received by strangers. When this encounter is pleasant, repeated, and consistent, we derive a renewed sense of affirmation about ourselves and a sense of security about the outer world itself. Think about the pleasant encounter you have had with the gal or guy behind the counter at your neighborhood coffee bistro, or a member of your hot yoga class, or the pharmacist at your corner drugstore. 
 
These are not meaningless interactions. Loneliness and a sense of isolation are pervasive. And the headlines are filled with violence, incivility and unrest: 
      Nicole Leaves a Coastline in Chaos
      Identification Policies Leave Transgender People Sterile
      Russian Missiles Cross into Poland During Strike on Ukraine
 
Casual acquaintances both foster a sense of belonging and give our happiness quotient a positive boost – helping us withstand the onslaught of negative emotions and bad news.
 
Think:
        Brief chats
        A joke exchange
        A smile 
        A thumbs-up
        A wink and nod
        A friendly smile 
        A bit of casual conversation
 
The holidays are coming up. Families will be getting together for Thanksgiving. Often our conversations with people we share blood with can be emotionally taxing. But Weak Tie relationships? They are often transactional. They are often easier because they are less demanding. And they are often with people we know less well – making the stakes lower.
 
Let’s be thankful for our close circle of family and friends – which is essential for our well-being and sense of community. But let’s also be mindful of the riches we can gather from the Weak Ties we both cultivate and nourish. 
 
Keep Preserving Your Bloom,
 
Iris Ruth Pastor
 
Next week I’ll further explore the topic of Weak Ties:
I’ll illustrate how Weak Ties can open up new vistas of opportunity for us. 

In the meantime, e mail me some examples of Weak Ties in your life and the influence they have had