This week was quite an emotionally packed week no matter whom you voted for POTUS. Trump and Biden fight it out to the end as election officials faced long hours and close vote counts in battleground states.
History was made on many fronts. So what better thing to do in the days following this historical election and its aftermath than to document our feelings and reactions for the generations to come? Our descendants will surely be posing questions to us on this notable moment in our history.
There’s a vehicle to do just that: an Ethical Will
What is an Ethical Will?
An ethical will is a way to preserve our values and impressions for our family both while we are still alive and after we pass. Ethical wills are written when facing challenges, marking milestones events or passing on our impressions of a certain time in our lives that impacted us greatly. This is a great vehicle for imparting life lessons that we want to pass on to our kids and grandkids – to clarify our values and visions – to expound on what we believe in, and give context to what we have done with our lives.
As Rachel Freed says in her book Women’s Lives, Women’s Legacies, “If our lives are to have lasting meaning, we must use them as a sacred link, consciously connecting the past and the future.” We do this by putting into words and offering our articulated legacy to loved ones while we are still alive – so it becomes a gift to both the present and the future.
When we create an ethical will, we learn about ourselves, reflect on our life, articulate what we stand for, tell stories that illustrate our values, and pass on something for perpetuity. Ethical Wills provide something tangible to return to over time to measure how our thinking has evolved.
Sample story starters for an Ethical Will on this election cycle:
- What I have learned about my values as I witnessed this election cycle……
- Living through this election, I believe an important lesson learned was…
- Remember that one person can make a difference. Why you make your life worthwhile when you vote….
- In the aftermath of this election, I learned why it is important to listen closely to those who think and vote differently than me…..
- The event during this election cycle that had the biggest impact on me was….
- How I view the United States of America in the light of the results of the Biden/Trump election of 2020 and what hopes I have for the future….
- Here’s some historical facts to keep in mind on why I value the right to vote so highly….
Why write an Ethical Will?
We are obliged to record our personal values and family stories in order to strengthen the fabric of civilization – and to make sure that our perspective is preserved and the life lessons we have learned are communicated.
As Marian Wright Edelman said, “My parents’ example and messages keep me grounded when I am tempted to lose sight of what is important amidst the mounting demands of work and family and a culture that values things and style and packaging and publicity over substance and service and concrete action.”
An Ethical Will can be long or short.
An Ethical Will can be saved on the computer or written on archival, acid free paper and stored in a safe space.
An Ethical Will can be free flowing or stilted, eloquent or stream of consciousness.
It doesn’t matter.
An ethical will is a timeless gift from the heart that our children and our children’s children will thank us for, bless us for and love us for writing.
Keep Preserving Your Bloom,
Iris Ruth Pastor
PS: I’ll be participating in the expo below via a pre-recorded interview centering on women and eating disorders.
Treat Yo Self Feel Better Expo
November 13-15
Here is the link to register: https://maryrosefoundation.org/expo/
PS #2: if you’d like to delve deeper into Ethical Wills, here are two excellent resources:
Ethical Wills by Barry K. Baines
So That Your Values Live on – Ethical Wills and How to Prepare Them by Jack Riemer and Nathaniel Stampfer