“There are only three things women need in life:
food, water, and compliments.”
Chris Rock
Now that is a quote worth remembering.
Years ago Sarah Breathnach published a gem of a book called Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy. In it, she suggested we all look for three things to be grateful for.
“Wow,” I lamented to my husband that evening, “what a ridiculous, simplistic and trite notion!”
“Why don’t you try it? he countered quietly.
I stopped in my tracks. I ruminated on the suggestion. And I then concluded, “What the hell did I have to lose?”
Immediately I started searching for grateful-worthy things. Some days finding things that engendered a warm glow of gratitude were easy; others not quite so seamless. Gradually, though, I slid into the rhythm of searching for the positive, uplifting and magical.
Surprisingly, I discovered even the mundane, routine and run-of-the-mill registered on my gratitude radar screen. I began noting everything – minute or gigantic – that moved my gratitude meter in a positive direction.
Admiring the wooded view from my office on the second floor of my house.
Gazing at the collection of knitted purses I’d made over the years – stowed away on shelves in one of my closets.
Finding a very old picture of two of my sons with retired baseball player George Foster from decades ago and forwarding it to them.
Being grateful for the little things worked. Instead of concentrating on my fears, my woes, my aggravations and disappointments, I pushed all that stuff aside in my quest to seek out the pleasant and the pleasing. I went through my days intent on finding things to be thankful for – specific things – diverting my attention away from negativity.
It’s the same template for COMPLIMENTS. Turn your mindset in a more positive way with friends and family and people you interact with.
Begin concentrating on something to compliment them on, rather than focusing on what they do that drives you to distraction. Veering from the downbeat, unhelpful and unconstructive silo into the zone of positivity benefits everyone.
We all recognize that compliments are powerful, day-brightening, confidence building and validating tools. But beware of over use or misuse.
EXERCISE DISCERNMENT: take the time to find out what the individual you are planning on complimenting could best benefit from. Is it complimenting a character trait? A physical attribute? A professional achievement? Compliment accordingly.
OBSERVE: strive to compliment what makes that person stand out above the rest. Take the time to reflect on what you admire about the person. Then fire away. National Compliment Day was created in 1998 by Kathy Chamberlin, of Hopkinton, NH and Debby Hoffman, of Concord, NH. These women felt that through the giving of compliments a positive connection with anyone would be achieved.
National Compliment Day was Januray 24th – and that day has passed. World Compliment Day was March 1 – and that day has passed too But my event, “The Art of Female Friendship,” is fast approaching and has the same aim: to foster positive connections.
Registration closes on Monday, April 8. If you’d like to be a part of this groundbreaking event designed to forge and strengthen interpersonal ties with your friends, here’s the registration link:
https://jewishtampa.redpodium.com/preserving-your-bloom
Keep Preserving Your Bloom,
